Learning curve.

Success is a relative term that we all have to define for ourselves. When I started my publishing journey I had to learn about a lot of new things that I hadn’t considered before. Ironically, the easiest part of this whole process is the writing! Yes, that’s the part I find myself retreating to when the rest of this experience becomes too much.
Has my writing style and process changed since I released my first novel? Yes. You have to let it be organic. Every new experience adjusts our perspective, so our writing will always adjust to compensate.
But what I didn’t do was make a concrete assertion of what “success” would look like. I suppose we all have a vague idea of what it would look like to achieve our dreams. But when you start on the path to try and realise your ambition the whole thing takes on a new configuration.
I’m not actually here to talk about writing, but as I previously stated, writing is my go to place when I’m struggling elsewhere. So why am I here? I’m not really sure, to be honest. I sat staring at the empty post for a while… and that’s not like me. I’m one of these strange people who love the white, blank page. It doesn’t intimidate me, it excites me, because it lies there ready to absorb the adventure, to record the comedy and drama woven in the words.
But I sat and I stared… I could write about writing. I could write about publishing. I could write about process. I could talk about opinion. Today, I’m vexed by a challenge that I can’t overcome. I can’t think my way out of it. I can’t write my way out of it. With those two avenues exhausted I sit and I stare.
I can write full-length romantic fiction. I can publish novels in various digital formats and in paperback. I can create and maintain websites. I can blog. I can interact on social media. Other than the first, these are all things that I’ve had to learn since I started this publishing journey. What can’t I do? Find a way to encourage readers to engage with me as a writer.
I don’t know if it’s me. I don’t know if it’s my novels. But no matter how much I talk to and question people, and generally try to encourage dialogue, readers are reluctant. Why is that?
So I do what any sane person would do, I consult the plan for achieving my goal… hmm… What does success look like? Goals in writing can be severely narrowed… “I must edit this many chapters this week…” “I must reach this word count.” “I must write the blurb, description, design a cover…” “Come up with a character name…” the list is endless. But because it can be divided into so many segments it’s easy to focus on each task and ignore the big picture.
At first it’s just a wonder to see your book on Amazon! Then it’s amazing to see the red line on your sales dashboard graph move at all. All of these little feats become cause for celebration. Mastering the tasks in themselves can feel like climbing mountains and reaching summits. What do you do when you’re over the mound of learning, and comfortable enough in the process, then realise that you’re lacking?
You try to find a task to complete… but there isn’t one. You can’t achieve a task toward a goal when you don’t know what success looks like. I do wonder how other indies measure their success, is it in sales? Maybe its in monetary terms? Or maybe it’s the number of dedicated fans that they have?
Success is relative, but I still don’t know where it stands in relation to me… could it be hiding around the next corner? But if you’re standing on the road alone, when is it time to accept that you’ve taken a wrong turn?

Good luck on your adventures,

Scarlett

Explicit Instruction

We are not alone.

There is so much horror and suffering in the world. I get frustrated when people try to boil down global issues of persecution and terrorism into quick sound bites. But I’m not here to go on a rant about politics or religion.
When I see the stats on these things and hear people talking about genuine human agony in abstract terms I am struck by how insulting and desperately sad it is. We talk about people dying in tens, hundreds, and thousands as though the figures are enough to shock. Yes, they are shocking but that’s not what shocks me.
I think about my life, about the people we see every day, people we know, strangers, friends, it doesn’t matter. But these people, we as people, go about our lives taking everything we have for granted. I hear about death and I wonder at the hopes and dreams that have been shattered. Did that person have dreams of fame and riches, or did they just wish for the safety of their children?
Think about the adverts on the television asking us to donate money to distant countries where children die needlessly every single day, now look at your own children. The parents in those countries love their children as we do, now can you imagine what it would be like to have your child come to you, to say they were thirsty, and the only thing you could give them was water you knew might kill them?
It breaks my heart. There’s no solution. I am not on my high horse here. I don’t do enough. None of us do enough. But it’s pushing on the ocean. We can’t live surrounded by guilt because these things are not about personal guilt.
Things are awful in the world but they always have been and they probably always will be. We’re more aware of atrocities because of our twenty-four hours news access but these things have always happened. But still, it breaks my heart. It’s just so sad on a human level.
I suppose I bring this up because now I’m working hard to achieve my dream. I am so thankful that I have this chance. I can’t tell you what it means to have others embrace my toil. But all I have are words. What I do may be frivolous in larger terms but it is what it is.
So the next time you hear in the news about the death toll, about one side killing the other with no end in sight, try and imagine the faces of the innocent who are gone. They had lives, they had dreams that would never come to fruition, people can be cursed by geography and religion. But we are blessed.
If you have a dream, whatever it is, you have to go out and do your damndest to achieve it because we should all embrace that chance, not everyone gets that chance. Think of the faceless, those suffering, people who just want to live their lives in peace, who want to raise their children, and be happy. We can’t assure our happiness, there are things that happen outside of our control, but if you can change it then change it.
Be empowered. Get out into the world. Free yourself of the constraints that hold you back. If you have an unhappy life, take stock. If you have a dream you have not achieved, or not attempted, try a little bit every day to move forward. Encourage those you love. Hug your children. Know every day that you are alive and take half a minute, not every day, not all day, just thirty little seconds to think about those you know, those you have lost, those gone from this world who we never had the chance to know.
We are so insignificant in this immense universe but that does not mean we are unimportant. But nor are those without chance and opportunity to make something, anything, of their lives.
I could go on and on about this, about taking control of yourself, about acting in spite of the fear, but I’d bore you all to tears! This post isn’t meant to be a lecture but now that I’ve written it I don’t want it to go unread. Each of us have to see the luck that we have and try to minimize any negativity.
Be kind, because it’s all any of us can be. Maybe if we each push just a little bit, just a tiny bit every day, the ocean will move. It’s worth a try, what’s the alternative?

Good luck on your adventures,

xSx